I'm supposed to study for my midterms, but nvm, just had this sudden urge to blog.
I had a long talk with my father just now and he was telling me about family related problems. It was about my aunts doubting my father's motives when all he wanted was to help my grandma. It happened long time ago and I feel quite sad for him. Imagine your own siblings bad mouthing you, or painting a bad image of you in front of your parents. And all you wanted to do was to help. A lesson my father learnt and told me, was that siblings should not 挑拨离间. Surprisingly I could draw a strong parallel from this to what happened recently. Even though I'm not involved in the incident, I feel quite sad that it has happened.
What happened was that Z and L (both I know, they both know each other beforehand too) got into the same group for a module. Subsequently, they had disagreements and I think they quarreled. L then tweeted that he "chose the right module but he didn't chose the right group mate." A few days later, Z posted a status on facebook hinting that she knows about the tweet. Apparently, someone had either told her or showed her the tweet, since L locked his twitter and Z didn't have twitter. The "someone" can be easily deduced to be someone from a certain organization, since L and Z belonged to the same organization and there were some other members of the organization who followed L on twitter.
Yes, I'm not involved, but I have to say this.
But WHY DID THE "SOMEONE" HAVE TO SHOW L's TWEET TO Z? For fuck? To 挑拨离间? I thought all of us once more than acquaintances cus all of us once belonged to that organization. I thought we were at least friends. Like if the "someone" already know that there's some disagreements between these two people, why would "someone" choose to show something to Z that would aggravate the whole thing? At first, despite their disagreements, Z and L were still friends. Now, Z doesn't even say hi to L anymore and I wonder if they would still be friends in the future. "SOMEONE", ARE YOU FUCKING HAPPY NOW? Friends just don't do that to each other. Maybe L was wrong for posting that or maybe he was just angry at that point in time, but "someone", you didn't have to show that to Z. You don't want them to be friends anymore? Even though friends are not as close as siblings, but I feel that, as mutual friends, we should not try to deepen the animosity. Instead, we should try mediate or at least, act as if nothing happened.
I really feel quite sad that it has happened and maybe it showed how shallow the friendships were.
"Someone", I really hope you regret what you did.
p/s "someone", maybe you can show this to Z too, if that's what you like to do.
p/s/s I know from some sources that there are other people in the organization trying to 挑拨离间 too and it pains me so much. WHYYYY.
Omg the more I think about it, the more angry I get. Hope it pass soon and thank goodness I'm not part of this organization this semester.
Hello.
ReplyDeleteThis whole episode saddens me. I agree fully that I once thought we were all friends. True friends.
I forgot if I told ziyi about the tweet, but even if I did I won't feel apologetic about it. Twitter never was, and never will be private sphere. You can delete me if you are wary of me.
Regardless, I still feel that you are being very unfair to nusco. Fact is that every group has its problems and if you think nusco is fucked up, fine. But I definitely disagree. I've made some of my best friends in here and I think you did too.
Sincerely,
Your friend, hopefully
To the above comment:
ReplyDeleteYes, twitter will never be a fully private space, where thoughts and opinions can be contained strictly within. However, your argument is flawed. Your decision to show or tell ziyi the tweet was uncalled for, and hence it's a major surprise you don't feel a single ounce of remorse (assuming you did it).
Putting yourself in that scenario, would you expect what you term a 'true friend' to rat on you like the above scenario and cause a rift between, perhaps, you and a friend of yours? Is this really what a 'true friend' would do? If your answer to the above is 'yes', then there would be no need to carry on reading n as it would be pointless.
Dear Daoteng, to always prove you're correct doesn't mean you're right all of the time, and this is something you have to change, in my honest opinion, in order to become a better leader, as well as a better person. Bravely admit you are in the wrong if you are (not implying that you are wrong in this circumstance).
Just my humble opinion based on what I've read in the above blogpost, and knowing the individuals involved personally.
P.S: I chose to express my view here as I know there won't be much of a chance daoteng will come back and expect to see a reply to his comment. But if you are reading this, I hope it helps you realise how you always yearn to be correct. It is a negative trait, not a positive one.
P.P.S: Thank you Jing Wen for allowing my reply to stay here.